Let's begin by opening our hearts to all the suffering that we are now aware of, caused by coronavirus, or caused by other factors, like poverty or war.
The way I open my heart these days is just to picture someone whom I'm missing at the moment-- someone whom I love and I'd love to see again. So I'm picturing my father, who's 93, and very frail with lots of health issues. I'm picturing what it would be like when I next see him. Seeing him from a distance, seeing him smile and laugh, rushing towards him, and hugging him close. Hearing his voice, and just hugging him, hugging him. I can even imagine the conversation that we're going to have and exactly how I will feel at that time.
Now that I have this loving feeling, it's easy to spread this out to include, first of all, all the old people who are frail and maybe lonely, maybe alone, maybe unwell, maybe frightened.
Then let's spread this further to include all those who are suffering. Can you feel your heart opening? Maybe you feel sensations in the chest area, vulnerability, maybe a pain, maybe a warm feeling of love. Notice how your heart and body feels when it's opening.
Now I want to talk about some of the things that I've noticed during the last six or so weeks. The first thing I've been noticing is uncertainty, insecurity, not knowing. I've been noticing just how deeply uncertain things are. There's so much we don't know about the virus, exactly how it's spread, how people can carry it without having symptoms, how long it's going to last, how long the restrictions on our movement and on what we can do are going to last. We don't really have any idea what's going to happen next, to us individually, to our family and friends, to our jobs, to our financial situation, to our society. I've also been noticing how this uncertainty connects those in the affluent west--in Belgium, in the UK, in the USA, in France, in Germany--to a large proportion of mankind. For most of mankind's history, and for vast numbers of people on this planet now, insecurity and uncertainty are what they face every day. For example, according to the World Health Organization, 27% of the world's population, nearly 2,000,000,000 people, face food insecurity. They do not know where their next meal is coming from. Our time, the time from the end of the Second World War until now, in our Western societies, is actually an exception in human history. And it's unsustainable. The price the planet is paying in terms of depleted or lost resources, in terms of global warming, extinction of species, and so on, is unsustainable. The truth is that our current economic model is also impermanent. Therefoere, this is a time to realize deeply the truth of uncertainty and of its relationship to suffering. It is a time to develop compassion for all those who are suffering at the moment. It is a time to look at what we can do to make life on this planet more sustainable.
One of the results of all this uncertainty is worry or fear. We are frightened for ourselves; we are frightened for our loved ones; we are frightened about the future. We don't feel safe or secure anymore. We don't feel in control anymore. Things in our own lives, and in all the world around us, seem out of control. Hoarding food, masks, and toilet paper, is a way of gaining some control, feeling safer. The more toilet rolls I have, the safer I am! In the first five or six days of lockdown I lived mostly on rice and dahl. I realize that, actually, this is more than a lot of people in Sri Lanka had. But my mind was still saying, "If only I had some vegetables." Then it moved on to, "If only I had some chocolate" or "If only I had a beer." This latter, seeking safety in alcohol, is an old pattern that I thought had left me!!
When the mind feels in distress, it often fixates on one thing, one conclusion, one solution, or one person to blame. I noticed my mind saying things like "Johnson should...," "The world health organization should ..." and "People should...." This is almost exactly the opposite of mindfulness, awareness, and compassion. Awareness sees the big picture and doesn't want to fix it. It just does what it can.
What we are doing here, when we think that things outside us are going to give us satisfaction or to keep us safe, is placing happiness outside ourselves. We are seeking refuge in things. Have you noticed what you've been seeking refuge in? Was it alcohol, sex, or the TV? (My neighbors have been turning the TV on at 5:30 in the morning and then off again at 11 at night and sitting in front of it, seeking refuge in information, entertainment, and distraction.) Talking of distraction, something else I've noticed is that feeling of boredom and restlessness, and loneliness. Also, one of my distractions has been picking up a so-called spiritual book, or meditating, rather than actually staying with the feeling that's present. Interesting! We can even use spiritual practice as a distraction from discomfort! Another thing that I've noticed is that I've been seeking refuge in routine--doing things at the same time every day; for example, having my coffee at 10 o'clock in the morning and my tea at 3 o'clock in the afternoon. Again, it's looking outside for refuge.
Another thing we seek refuge in is our minds, our ideas, and our thoughts. We think that the numbers are going down, so things are getting better. We think that, if we understand coronavirus better, we will feel better. We jump to conclusions, rather than just staying with the uncertainty, the insecurity of not knowing. I know who to blame, so I feel better. Coronavirus is blameless. But that doesn't stop us from shifting blame on to the Chinese, our leaders, or our neighbors, all of which reduces our connection to others. Finally, we seek refuge in the past and in the future. We seek refuge in things returning back to normal, back to the way they used to be. But normal was never normal. The way things used to be was never the way things used to be. These are just thoughts, ideas, and projections. Our normal way of doing things is driving the planet towards catastrophe.
It's also an opportunity to realize our connection, interconnection, inter-dependence, or "interbeing," to use Thich Nhat Hahn's beautiful word. How deeply connected we are. The coronavirus doesn't respect passports or borders. We are very much in this together. It's an opportunity to realize that every grandmother that dies is my grandmother, every father that dies is my father. We are all brothers and sisters, nieces and nephews, grandparents and grandchildren. We cannot separate our health from the health of others. Washing hands, wearing a mask, and not touching our faces, are acts that don't just protect us. They protect others as well. The deep truth of the third characteristic of existence is that there is no separate self. We are interconnected. At the deepest possible level there is no separate being called Ewen or Paul or Boris.
Thus, this virus allows us a deep insight into the three characteristics of existence--impermanence, suffering, and non-self. It also, unsurprisingly, gives us insight into the divine messengers--the truth of illness, the truth of old age, and the truth of death.
What's to be done? How do we act? What do we take refuge in? What are we to practice?
Obviously, metta meditation--meditation on loving kindness--is useful at a time like this, as is practicing compassion, kindness, neighborliness, and tenderness. Good questions are: "How can I help?" and "What can I do to make a difference in someone's life, to reduce someone else's suffering?" It may be making a phone or video call, shopping for someone, or giving someone food or money.
At a time like this, it's really important to work with our minds and to make friends with our minds. For example, if we're feeling worried or anxious, it might be helpful to be specific and to go to the roots of our anxiety, taking one thing or one person we're anxious about at a time. Are we worried for ourselves? Are we worried about our health? Are we worried about our finances? Are we worried about our loved ones and their health or their state of mind? It's useful to observe how our anxiety feels in the body and how we experience it. We can be lovingly curious about what's happening in our minds and our bodies. For example, we can say, "Thank you for telling me that you're anxious. Would you like to tell me more about it?" Often when we feel fearful, our question is "How can I get rid of this?" rather than "How can I experience this more fully?"
Whatever stories the mind is telling, it's really useful to stay with them and to observe them. This is the way we connect with our suffering, rather than just being the suffering, rather than just suffering. Are we worried about pain? Are we worried about death? Our normal tendency is to try to control our mind and our emotions. This is a good opportunity to give up the illusion of control and to give up trying to distract ourselves when we feel uncomfortable or in pain. We may be worried that we are losing our freedoms. In America people are protesting for the right not to wear a mask, to go to a garden center, to play golf, to go shopping, and to have a massage or a haircut. Someone I know in the UK was complaining that he couldn't get his favorite brand of wine. Freedom for many people has been confused with being able to do exactly what we want when we want. Freedom in the Buddhist sense is not being controlled by our wants and desires. That is true freedom, the freedom from suffering.
When we work with our mind, we're also working with our emotions, such as loneliness and sadness. Godwin, my first teacher, used to make a distinction between loneliness, which is a kind of suffering, wanting the world to be different than it is, and aloneness, which is enjoying our own company, becoming our own best friend,or "becoming our own toy," in Godwin's words. To what extent can we be alone with ourselves?
Many of us have a lot of time to practice walking meditation inside our house or flat or in our garden. And to practice mindfulness, being aware of what we're doing throughout the day, especially as regards protecting ourselves and others.
We mustn't forget also to seek nourishment by seeing the beauty and wonder that surrounds us, by contacting nature, even if it's only the plants in our own garden, our house, or our flat. The skies are bluer now. There is less pollution, and there is more silence. My dogs really enjoyed the April New Year in Sri Lanka because there were almost no firecrackers. Many of us are spending more time with our loved ones than we usually do, and many of us can use the technology that's available to contact our loved ones by Skype or Zoom.
There are great teachings happening all around us at the moment and there aregreat opportunities to practice. Don't waste them!